"Come, let's scatter roses and pour wine in the glass;
we'll shatter heaven's roof and lay a new foundation.
If sorrow raises armies to shed the blood of lovers,
I'll join with the wine bearer so we can overthrow them.
With a sweet string at hand, play a sweet song, my friend,
so we can clap and sing a song, and lose our heads in dancing."
-Hafiz (Ghani-Qazvini, No. 374); Sufi Muslim Musician
Unfortunately I've been pretty swamped with schoolwork lately and just living life to post something of content on here. I suppose a quote counts as content and can be just as valuable as my own insight, but I like to think readers (the few out there) value the personal more. This quote in particular I pulled out of a reading for a class, and fit my mood at the moment. I'm listening to relaxing music sitting in my room letting my mind wander all over the place, trying to tame it and wondering if that is necessarily even a good thing. My mind seems to dart from corner to corner, operating in space almost, my body a vessel it is simply attached to. The music expands me mentally, simultaneously inducing calmness and an excited awe. I'm almost like a kid in a candy shop, but all the candy is free, and I can taste everything and anything that I want to (albeit, with my ears).
I regret posting on this blog because it creates moments for me like this to just spill my thoughts onto paper, thoughts that I would feel foolish to bring up directly in conversation, or even in the classroom, but still need to get out. Its almost as if part of myself spills out onto the "paper" (in this case, my keyboard). In front of me exists a conglomoration of plastic keys, manufactured in some faraway land, perhaps not even by human hands. Same with my ipod, same with the desk that my arms rest upon. So many moments have come together to create this singular point in time, this release for my mind which is incredibly healthy and soothing. Humans need to express, and this moment grants that.
All humans need a therapist, a friend once told me. I don't agree with her, and know many people who would argue against that claim. I think, though, that every person needs therapy. We spend so much of our lives living and going through the motions that sometimes, a person just needs therapy - whether that therapy be music, writing, a sport, or hell, even just laying in the grass (or, in my friend's case, an understanding and sympathizing person). Each individual has a baby's bottle, a something that nurtures and satisfies the human need for happiness. Today, a saw a friend who is usually extremely angry, depressed, and pessimistic get his therapy. My friend was offered a position in film, a something he gushes about, a something that infuses him with passion. He sees three therapists, but this is the first time I have seen him truly happy in a long time. It made me so joyous, so happy, just to see him smiling, laughing, and legitimately loving and valuing his own life.
This blog, this writing? This is my therapy. This is my happiness. This is my life, for you.
