Visual DNA

personality.visualdna.com/1/index.php/

I took this very interesting personality "test" over at the site above. Saved here simply for reference's sake...I think it eerily captures some of who I am.

Spirit
You're a Seeker. You're kind and courteous and a great support to your friends. You have a wonderfully warm energy that is an inspiration to others. A sensitive soul with an expressive nature, you tend to be quite a romantic at heart. Sometimes you love nothing more than escaping into your very own dreamworld. Spontaneous new experiences can be really inspiring to you and you like exploring your creative side from time to time. Right now, life probably feels pretty good. You have a healthy balanced attitude and know how to take the good with the bad. You're feeling comfortable in your own skin. A healthy relationship really is the bedrock of a happy home, but it also takes a lot of energy and commitment to maintain. Make sure that with all the other distractions, your love life doesn't end up at the bottom of the list. It's important to remember to tap into your inner strength and to believe in yourself. Take on new challenges and stay stimulated so you remain enthusiastic and inspired by life. As a Seeker, you get excited by new ideas. You like adventure and original experiences that stimulate and challenge your status quo. Stay inspired with a rich mix of activities, and find time for hobbies that allow you to explore your creative side. Learn to recognize when you need variety in your life, and then incorporate it into your daily plans. There's no better way to feel centered and balanced than to spend some time out in the fresh air. You understand that a change of scenery can reinvigorate you and remind you of what matters most in the world. Remember, it's not a luxury but a necessity, so allow yourself that quiet time as often as you can.


Relationship
You would like to be able to share your spiritual side with your new partner. Feeling at peace with the world comes naturally when you're travelling life's path with your soulmate. You're a deeply passionate person and will go to extreme lengths for love. You're naturally open and find it easy to make connections. It's all about intuition and chemistry and being swept off your feet. Love means opening yourself up to intense experiences that you'll remember for the rest of your life. You are expressive and sensual and, so making a strong physical connection is important to you. It feels really good to lose yourself in the moment. There's nothing like being in love to put a smile on your face, butterflies in your stomach and a spring in your step.
Relationship tips:

So you're Passionate but what tips can we give for when you're looking for love?

Take it easy. Allowing your new relationship to develop gradually would be a really healthy approach for you. Slow and steady wins the race in this case.
Make friends. Connecting on a physical level is really important to you. But set strong foundations by getting to know each other first.
Slow and steady wins the race. Take things at a sensible pace so you'll keep your feet on the ground and stay realistic about what will work in your everyday life.
You are naturally warm and trusting. Just make sure to follow your instincts and listen to your head as well as your heart before diving in too deep.


Money
You're a techie, and you love to have the best new gadgets. You like your technology sleek and fast, so would love to be able to upgrade to the newest models whenever possible. The true mark of success for you is a happy home. It is the main focus of your life and the center of all your aspirations. You're happiest when you feel settled and comfortable. True fulfillment for you is in having strong, loving relationships with family and friends. If they're healthy and happy, that's all that matters to you.

Health
Your mornings are about taking quiet time to focus on the day ahead, gathering your thoughts and making sure you feel centered and balanced before you head into the world. Woulda-coulda-shoulda just isn't in your vocabulary. You've learned that if you want to feel great, you need to take the positive steps yourself. It's all about valuing yourself enough to take the time to what's best for you and your body. You like exploring alternative therapies and the holistic side of things. The key is to keep your energy balanced - no sugar highs or caffeine crashes. It's all about having a twinkle in your eye and embracing every minute of the day.


Home
If you took some time out to visualize your dream life, you could probably see yourself away from the rat race, chilling out on a beach. Nothing puts a smile on your face like waking up to sun, sea and sand without a care in the world. Fresh fruit, seafood and not a cloud in the sky...sounds like paradise!


Entertainment
You're an outdoorsy person, happiest when you can get out into the fresh air and explore what the countryside has to offer. You can't beat a few quiet hours in the peace of nature to be alone with your thoughts. Perfect for feeling refreshed and rejuvenated!


Style
You like to take things easy. Life's busy enough without having to worry about getting dressed up every day. It's about maximum comfort with a splash of style, so it's hard to beat your favorite pair of jeans. But don't forget how good it can feel to give yourself a makeover every now and then. It can work wonders for your self-esteem to refresh your wardrobe, spruce up your hair and put on a great. So make sure you schedule a shopping trip every few months. You deserve it!


Travel
You have a passion for discovery and living life to the fullest. After all, there's so much to make the most of. Travelling the world is a chance to meet new people. For you, a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet. When it comes to time off, you know it's precious, so chances are you'll be trying to do as much as you can. Creature comforts are still important to you, so if you can see the world in a bit of luxury, why not?

Understanding Sound

Music has a way of capturing
Who I am
Who we are
Humans floating on
Through the universe
Up through the stars
Sailing through the ether
Feeling the atmosphere
Experiencing
What a feeling
To experience
To feel
To laugh
To love
To cry
To rejoice
To understand
To jump
To decide
To dance
To be reborn
A new child
Coming into being
A beautiful you
A beautiful world
The world and your body
Becoming one
The vibrations
Sealing you together
An entire universe
At one with you
An entire you
At one with the universe
Your body spread
Infinitely
Embrace the feelings
Feel the sound
Leave your cave
Transcend your reality
The sounds a comforting blanket of warmth
That help you understand
Truth.
Optimism.
Love everyone
Love everything
I'm in love with everything that lives.

Lessons

Today I learned something that I think I've waited my entire life to learn. When someone or something comes along that makes you unhappy or depressed, you have two options. Two.

You can either:
1) Go on being depressed, get fat and stupid and old faster than you normally would.
2) Kick life in the nuts and work your ass off to better yourself, better others, and just smile.

I think that's a pretty valuable lesson to learn.

Smile :)

Nature.

I like her
Yet I don't know how to say it
A scattered being, yes
But a small person at that
A small person indeed, a tiny fragment of what I once was
What does it mean to make her a part of your life?
Why should she be a part of your life?
Do you even care?
Does she even care?
Of course you do, but you might just present a facade
Of course you will, because you are weak
But what does it mean to be weak?
Are you really weak, or just scared?
Whats the difference?
Being weak, being afraid, does it matter which I feel?
It matters not which, but rather what the outcome reveals I should do
A helpless child in the presence of a beautiful captor
How does she hold me captive so?
All I want is to be in her presence
Yet nobody understands my plight
They walk away, abandoning my thoughts
Simply not understanding what so plagues my mind
Wanting to reveal my feelings
But halted by my inhibitions
Why
Why
Why
Is it so difficult?
She's the light in my life
Yet the bane of my existence
A sure beauty
Yet a lover of my plight.
I know she doesn't delight in this
But she does not know
All in all, its really my fault
This plight, this night, of all.
I wonder 'bout obsession
But then I simply understand
A like, a love, a plight like this
Comes but once in life.

Scattered

I am a broken man
Limping from side to side
I rock back and forth
A fractured piece of meat
A curved, misshapen beast
My spine goes not straight
But down the path to my bruised brain
Encased in my skull a delicate shell
Of who I am
And of who I used to be
Does it matter?
Am I at all?
These scars on my face
And on my feet
Don't tell the whole story
I am not Jesus Christ
Nor am I a savior
I sacrifice for my team
And for nothing else
A release of brute strength and energy
Little thought involved
I sometimes wonder how the same person writes
That wants to strangle someone for the faintest thing
Who is Ian? Who is this? Who are you?
I am a combination of all
Not just my exploits on the field
Nor my lost self in thought
A body and mind united
Energy and happiness one
A being with many interests
A product of chance
Or, perhaps, of God
How have I arrived at this moment?
This oh so fragile, delicate moment
A piece of time no one could have imagined
Nature or nuture? Animal or human?
Both, perhaps?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why do we ask these questions?
Do you have the answers?
Do I?
Who am I?
I ask not post structurally
But curiously
A Curious George awakened from his childhood
Perhaps a man
Perhaps a beast
Perhaps both, happy and carnal
Writing to discover myself
And to discover you.


A little change of direction from normal with a little bit of darkness. Mostly just scattered thoughts from a Thursday night...I might get rid of this but it felt good to write it. I definitely consider writing as one of the keys to mental health, as prompted by my Abnormal Psychology Professor Susan Trumbetta in class today. Sometimes it can be frustrating to ask all the questions and get none of the answers, though mystery keeps life incredibly interesting. I think posts like this are important because some of the best writing comes from a steam of thoughts and consciousness that you might've never thought possible. The stream of consciousness I just unleashed onto this "paper" came completely uninterrupted, completely unprompted, and completely unscripted. For one of the first times in my life, I was able to write without thinking. Its something I'm very proud of, and I know one of my former professors and advisor Christopher White would very much be glad to see.

Take what you wish from this. I may edit and streamline it later, I may not. If I don't, consider it a photocopy of my brain and of my thoughts (and honestly, how closely my thoughts are connected to my body following a tough rugby preseason). A completely honest unraveling of my being to you, for you. I love you, reader. I hope I have touched you in some way, or at the least, made you think.

The Dalai Lama Knows Whats Up

At the start of the new millennium the Dalai Lama apparently issued eighteen rules for living.

# 1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
# 2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
# 3. Follow the three Rs:
# 1. Respect for self
# 2. Respect for others
# 3. Responsibility for all your actions.
# 4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
# 5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
# 6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
# 7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
# 8. Spend some time alone every day.
# 9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
# 10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
# 11. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
# 12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
# 13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
# 14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
# 15. Be gentle with the earth.
# 16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
# 17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
# 18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Just some food for thought.

A Thought a Day Keeps the Doctor Away

I've been thinking a lot lately, especially since I have been traveling quite a bit on my own. Just a few days ago I returned from a beautiful trip in Washington, D.C., the nation's splendid capital. A simple square assaulted on all sides by different states, the people in D.C. struck me not as a group of overworked, overheated, discontent automatons but as humans appreciating and loving other humans. Though I normally think a lot (and have self-proclaimed myself as extremely "heady"), my experiences of people and nature in D.C. caused me to realize how much our overall health relates to our thoughts and our perceptions. A simple positive thought every day has the ability to completely change your world and how you feel in your world. The thought doesn't have to pertain to anything in particular, it can be about you, your friends, or your family; happy, honest, or abstract; simple, direct, or complex. I planned to begin writing (either in this blog or elsewhere) a thought from a moment of every single day, encapsulating that thought in all its beauty. This post serves as a simple start to that idea, a listing of a few thoughts of my own that I have experienced over the summer and this past year. Hopefully, time will permit me to elaborate further in the future, with the ability to dedicate entire posts to one single thought. For now, though, a few thoughts that have been lingering in my mind, in no particular order...

1. Never take anything for granted. This includes, but is not limited to: music, your parents, your good health, your friends, this planet, love, running water, electricity, the internet, the ability to read this right now, your body, your ears, your eyes, your nose, your fingers and toes, your limbs, your perceptions through each individual body part, your brain, your mind, your consciousness, your being, good food, food at all, the ability to taste, the ability to think about what you taste, water, your family, healthcare (if you have it), animals, nature, architecture, patterns, geometry, the small things, the clothes on your back, your questions, your answers, this universe, whatever put this beautifully chaotic universe into being, your worst times (you need those, too, to make you who you are), your best times, your fellow worker, the workers in your community, the average joe on the street, your fellow human beings. I could go on forever...you can decide how, when, or if this list will end.

2. Time alone is extremely valuable. Be sure to take time for yourself to do something you love. Take time for yourself to appreciate nature. Take time for yourself to relax. Take time for yourself to think. Take time for yourself to understand why. Take time for yourself to understand this universe. Take time for yourself to understand your mind and consciousness.

3. Friends are the most valuable people in your life. If they are true friends, never lose them, always trust them, and always be there for them. Your friends will get you through the worst and the best of times.

4. Never, ever, be embarrassed by or shun your parents (unless you have an extremely good reason, or they have wronged you in an irreparable way). Too many loving parents have been ignored by children who want to outgrow them. Your parents are the reason why you are here today, the reason why you are who you are today. They literally carry on in you, and you and your parents will forever be biologically intertwined. Accept their love and love them back, for they are a beautiful part of your life.

5. If you are ever feeling down or out of touch with reality, listen to your favorite piece of music. There is something incredibly human, moving, and radiant about what musically touches us. Never lose sight of what a valuable tool your ears can be for connecting with other humans.

6. People are constantly watching what you do. A favorite pasttime of almost all people is to people-watch, for whatever reason. That reason could be for absolutely anything - curiosity, laughter, self-esteem. Be a role model almost always. You never know who could be watching. Even if nobody is watching, its important to display a positive, loving attitude, because what people see is what they emulate. Think about how you judge and respond to the people you watch and interact with. Keep that in mind the next time you think you are alone, and no one is watching.

7. Constantly love and connect with your fellow human beings. Northeasterners stereotypically tend to be cold and calculating, a mere shadow of a human being who ignores human interaction at all costs. Send love to your fellow traveler, your fellow worker, your fellow Average Joe. It could make their day. In D.C., I was struck by the love and care that people put into interacting with me even though I will probably never see those people again. Most importantly, the love that those people showed me will stay with me for the rest of my life, an unwavering fingerprint upon my soul. Thank you, construction worker. Thank you, squash player. Thank you, gym manager. Thank you, housemate. Thank you, UPS delivery woman. Thank you, Nationals fans. Thank you, Nationals worker. Thank you, police officer. Thank you, Southwest airlines worker. Thank you, Metro security guard. I love each and every one of you. I hope I run into you at some point in the future. So, next time you have the chance, don't be afraid to help your fellow human being. You will never be afraid to ask for help or human affection again.

8. Look up at the night sky once in a while and just think about the universe. Trust me, you'll be amazed at the implications.


Those are just a few of the many thoughts I have had over the past year. I encourage you to take these as you will, and keep thinking positively about what makes the world go round.

Goodnight, friend.

Cognitive Science + Religion = Confusion

(Click image for full size)

Credit goes to Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Dubstep

I sit here and try to write
The perfect poem to describe
A gathering of particles
Formed together to create
That which does not belong
What is this mess I hear?
This gathering of atoms against air
So carefully organized, so masterfully connected
Why does it seem to make sense?
It spreads throughout my body
The cancer cells metastasize
My organs are anthropomorphized
One with each other, feeling and thinking
They bring the chaos together
An electronic masterpiece
A well executed orchestra
Of what it means to be alive...
DROP

Simply

Phew. I really haven't posted in a while - a while being an entire college semester. Though I now post with less frequency, I'd like to think that my posts have come a long way from a few years ago, when I would post little content just for the sake of getting something up on the blog. I think I finally realized that I write on this blog for myself, not to supply a content hungry audience with empty banter (though I do really appreciate the few of you that check this out from time to time!). Anyway, enough about my lack of content. Being home has reminded me of the beauty of solitude and quiet, a solitude infrequently found amongst the Vassar College campus (as beautiful as that wonderful place is). My friend Rob recently reminded me of my past love for poetry, a love he ignited with his reminder.

So, On Solitude

I stood there waiting
Waiting not for a what
But who
Who stood there with me
Out upon this black, empty space?
The only guidance
Two thin yellow lines
Straight, forever
Was this my destiny?
I seemed to think so
My body so content
Peaceful, almost
A light descended upon my face
I slowly looked
Ah, simply the moon
A light descended upon my chest
Ah, simply a car
A light descended upon my being
Ah, simply God
Simply?
What is simply, who is simply, why is simply?
Implying ineptitude
Denying beauty
This is not simple
This is truth
I stepped aside from the car
A sage
In a suburban wasteland
All because of simply?
Well, my friend
Simplicity is truth.

2010.

2010 was a funny year to say the least, a year marked by extreme personal, physical and spiritual growth. I think that 2010 began my march towards "manhood", whatever that even means. Towards the end of 2010, I finally began to realize that I no longer existed as a teenager (though I'm not 20 until August of 2011, and will never really relinquish healthy dashes of immaturity and spontaneity).

2010 began on a pretty mundane and foreshadowing note - a supposedly "crazy" New Years bash at my friend Emmy's house. Most of my friends had completed their first semester of college, and, being exposed to alcohol for the first time, decided it would obviously be a great plan to drink, and drink....and drink. The one thing I remember most vividly about this night (aside from the fact that I had a ridiculous argument with my girlfriend at the time because I wanted to spend the night with friends) was showing up around 7 or 8 and everyone already being absolutely plastered - and alcohol didn't even mar my memory. I remember beginning 2010 wanting to recreate 2009, a year which had me break out of my shell and make tons of new friends, enjoying the idealistic senior year and senior summer - hopping from grad party to grad party, hanging out with beautiful young women, and being invited to many a party.

My friend Kelly and I had promised to recreate the New Year we had at the start of 2009, when we stayed awake to enjoy a beautiful sunset on the beach with our friend Ian. 2010, it seemed, was doomed to be a failure from the start - we both fell asleep and made no real effort to even wake up, it just didn't seem worth it. From this, I think 2010 taught me that its foolish and naive to try and recreate and relive the past. Its better to just stick with the people you love and take life as it comes, enjoying experiences for what they are in the moment rather than what they were, or could have been.

Meanwhile, aside from the New Year, 2010 seemed great. My freshman year of college was going incredibly well: I was starting on the rugby team, I had made many good friends, I had ridiculously crazy times living the college life, and was doing well in school. Athletically, socially, and athletically, I was thriving - I knew I belonged at Vassar College, and I loved it. I traveled to Ireland with the mens' and womens' rugby teams over spring break, and got a wonderful new girlfriend. I was, most simply, satisfied. You could say that I was in love with Vassar College (I still am, don't get me wrong - just in a different way). I knew I was in love with Vassar College when, at the end of the year, I could not believe the year was ending - yet the year had taken so, so very long to pass by. Vassar College had rendered eternity a moment, and vice-versa.

Then, summer came. I expected greatness, again, a reliving of the epic senior summer of 2009. It was just...blah. I had pledged to my rugby team that I would work out ridiculously while working for my Mom at the family sandwich shop - and I did. But it left me empty, almost completely so. Each weekday, I got up at 7, showered, packed my gym bag with a change of clothes, and drove to work. At work, I made sure that I stayed hydrated, drinking about 2-3 gallons of water per day. I performed my working duties each day, mindlessly preparing food, making sandwiches, and washing dishes. I would then drive to the gym directly after, run 3 miles, and workout a predetermined muscle group. I would record my weight and reps for that day in a notebook, then drive home. At home, I would eat tons of proteiny-foods and drink my protein shake. By this time it would be about 5:30, my day completely gone in a tornado of work and exhaustion. I would then eat dinner with my family, and, maybe, if I wasn't too tired, drive to go hang out with friends. If not, I would stay home and play Rugby '06 on my old Xbox, wishing I was back at Vassar.

Every. Single. Day.

Needless to say, this absolutely destroyed me, drained me (and I would say I'm a pretty resilient person). Throw in the fact that two my greatest friends and absolutely amazing people were out of the country (Kelly and Woojin, I love you both so very much), and things not looking too good between me and my girlfriend at the time (we broke up), and you have a very discontent human being. I literally felt trapped in my own mind, a prisoner to the enslaving thought of "I MUST GET BACK TO VASSAR!" I thought that I had a life threatening heart condition, and would never be able to play rugby again. I thought about death and its inevitability so very much. What was worth doing, and why? Utter depression. I cried for help from my parents, trying to communicate to them how helpless I really felt. I would tell them how lonely I felt, how I would feel as if my mind was simply thrown into the abyss and that all I wanted was to be back at Vassar. Thank God for them. They reminded me to appreciate home, because I would likely miss it when I went back to Vassar.

And damn, they were right.

I arrived back at Vassar so, so incredibly happy. It was great to see the people I had missed so dearly over the summer. But soon, I began to become just as jaded as I had over the summer. I would either be sitting in my single room alone, wondering why I felt this way, or out partying and wondering why that was even so great (i had done it all freshman year, there was nothing new there, and nothing great, at the least). I believe I had lost my "childhood sense of wonder with the world", as Stanley Kubrick, the great director, would describe it. Kubrick, who presumably doesn't believe in God or a god, was quoted the following after being asked "If life is so purposeless, do you feel like its worth living?" in an interview with Playboy around 1970:

"Yes, for those of us who manage somehow to cope with our mortality. The very meaninglessness of life forces man to create his own meaning. Children, of course, begin life with an untarnished sense of wonder, a capacity to experience total joy at something as simple as the greenness of a leaf; but as they grow older, the awareness of death and decay begins to impinge on their consciousness and subtly erode their joie de vivre, their idealism - and their assumption of immortality. As a child matures, he sees death and pain everywhere about him, and he begins to lose faith in the ultimate goodness of man. But if he's reasonably strong - and lucky - he can emerge from this twilight of the soul into a rebirth of life's elan. Both because of and in spite of his awareness of the meaninglessness of life, he can forge a fresh sense of purpose and affirmation. He may not recapture the same pure sense of wonder he was born with, but he can shape something far more enduring and sustaining. The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent; but if we can come to terms with this indifference and accept the challenges of life within the boundaries of death - however mutable man may be able to make them - our existence as a species can have a genuine meaning and fulfillment. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light."

Kubrick seemed to perfectly describe what I was going through: I had lost my light, my fervor, my wonder with the world. Nothing seemed to excite me anymore, or at least not much excited me - and death was constantly on my mind (dark, huh?). As the first semester of my sophomore year rolled on, I searched and searched for that light, a light that could keep me going, and get my mind off an inevitable entity. I soon found through the help of my family, my friends, and God, a conclusion quite opposite that of Kubrick's. My conclusion pointed at a world filled with a vast light, a world created by a loving God with a beauty unsurpassed anywhere in the universe. I remember visiting a Sufi Islam Dhikr in New York City and being absolutely touched by its beauty, the Arabic of the prayer resonating completely with my body and mind despite my absolute lack of connection with Islamic culture. A man present at the dhikr described the prayer service as "food for the soul." Though I had heard this expression many times before, that night was the first time I absolutely felt the power of that expression. Light filled my body like never before, and it was as if I finally just...understood.

I began to more readily see the beauty inherent in my family and friends, and just people in general. As many hateful, terrible people exist in the world, there exists a beautiful being who brings light into the world in every way. Individuals who love show me that there is God. Have you ever seen a man or a woman in love? As championed as logic and the scientific approach are in our society, love renders the human completely irrational, completely devoted to the person despite the brain's logic. The heart of the human being acts in a complete and selfless love that I believe impossible without a loving God. Since I have felt love, and have seen love in another fellow human being, I can die a happy man. I remember seeing a girl at my scoliosis hospital who was missing a leg exhibiting the most genuine and joyous happiness I have ever seen - how could I be unhappy? The very fact that I was allowed to BE is an absolute blessing in itself, a beauty that, though it will pass within the period of a relatively few years, I will have had the grace of experiencing.

I remember one night in particular I discussed death with one of the most genuine and great people I know, my friend Andrew. We wondered what it would feel like; would there be a heaven or a hell? Are those just silly distinctions? Wouldn't death just be the nothingness that we "felt" (or, weren't really conscious of) prior to our existence? I don't know about you, but I don't remember being unhappy prior to my existence (thats probably because I didn't have a brain to remember with, but still...wouldn't death be similar?). Because death would be this same calm peace, we decided that a person would almost be able to shape his or her own heaven or hell, his or her after death experience. If God is within all of us (both transcendent and immanent), as I believe, then we, having a small bit of God within our very beings, have the power to shape our afterlife. Someone completely negative who finds no light in the world, a person who relies on things rather than souls to make them happy would likely find death an empty nothingness, an abandoned, icy cold wasteland of hell. As German psychologist Erich Fromm put it, "If I am what I have, and if I lose what I have, then who am I?" Nothing, pure nothingness. On the other hand, a positive person who finds light in the world, who takes joy in life and delights in soulful connections, would likely find death a peaceful end, a fitting end to a long life filled with happiness and light.

Hell, maybe I've made all this up just to keep myself happy, just like Kubrick said. But my mind, my heart, and my soul tell me that there really is a God out there, a God who is both immanent and transcendent, a God who cares about us and not who we worship or how we worship, as long as love is present. The power of human connection and love attests to this, as a unique and powerful expression of total commitment and happiness. Shoutouts to my Mom, my Dad, my family, Woojin Lee, Rob Duffy, Ian Gonzales, Oliver Goudiaby, Kelly Ward, Erin Gardner, Andrew Guzick, Rahul Kanade, Matt Elisofon, Matt Elgin, and Adam Steel for especially providing light in my life, as well as to others not mentioned here - you know who you are, and I love you with all my heart.

2011 started off with one of the greatest nights of my life, a beautiful New Years with a bunch of close friends gathering, a group of friends embracing in complete and total love and joy. Though 2011 marks the start of a new year, a year closer to my end, I can tell that 2011 is going to be an incredibly beautiful year, and look back at 2010 with as much awe as I do disappointment (there were so, so many good things amongst the ugly).

I am so incredibly fortunate, blessed with a wonderful life, family, friends, home, education, body and mind. Though I have discovered that I am mortal, I am so very content.

God bless.